Category: Newsletter

What if you don’t want to be a hero? Painting by Cheryl O Art It might be something about getting older. The urge to be the hero is more subdued these days. I still love the old tales. Narnia, and the children who turn into fair and just kings and queens. A Wrinkle in Time, more unlikely young heroes. Knights fighting or befriending dragons. Hobbits saving the world. Wonderful stuff for a young mind to marinate in. Then you grow up. Life is hard. One of the toughest things for me was to accept that not everything can be fixed. Happy endings? More about that at the, um, ending. Meanwhile… There are people who I love who have chronic pain and it can’t be fixed. It’s heartbreaking. They don’t deserve this. Another thing I was naively unprepared for is that some people take pleasure in hurting others. Yikes! As a child, I thought goodness was real, but evil was only a fantasy. Odd, but that was what I thought. This is not going to be a grim tale all about hurting. I’m writing to acknowledge that the hero thing doesn’t always look like we imagine as children. It’s that, plus also about happy endings. Caregiving My parents lived to 95 and 97, and I was their caregiver. Mom was in and out of being declared palliative for an incredibly long time. I was still working — running my own small business. Teaching fewer hours was part of how I managed. Good for their health, not good for my business. I was far from perfect. I fought the dragon of loneliness for my parents and advocated for them the best I could. There were moments that I wish I could have done better, moments the fatigue got to me. Finding a balance with self-care in that situation would indeed be a fantasy. My heart goes out to you if you are in this position. Being a caregiver for a senior is a job doomed to fail. That is if you consider that they eventually get worse and die to be a failure; but it’s not, it’s life. Death is as much a part of life as any other part. So there’s that. Dragons Today There was a time when slaying dragons appealed. Today, I understand better, it takes so much energy. If dragon slaying is part of your current journey, more power to you. There are many dragons out there: homelessness, sickness, and injustice in countless forms, to name a few. Let’s each do what we can to combat these. The harm is real and every bit of help in this battle can make a difference, even if we can’t all be heroes full-time. Let’s support those who are. This is important. You know the people I am talking about: those who work full-time as caregivers or to try to establish justice. Consider supporting these folks in any way you can. There was a time during Covid when people became aware of how difficult a job it is to work in long-term care. These workers hardly have time or energy to mourn when the one they are caring for passes away. Some folks work in hospital situations that are tremendously draining 

The path to being fully alive. Painting by Cheryl O Art We have art so that we shall not die of the truth.— Friedrich Nietzsche If truth is something that people die of, it begs the question… What’s killing us? Anxiety is running rampant. According to Psychology Today, “Anxiety is now the leading mental health problem around the world, and the incidence of anxiety is still rising, especially among youth.” Social media does not help. Overloaded with information, nothing feels worthwhile. Our thoughts are constantly interrupted, and we become scattered. We can’t process life’s fast pace but don’t know how to get out of the race. That feeling of being trapped and the stress it produces is not healthy. It can work its way into disturbed sleep and serious health issues. The commonly heard refrain is — to unplug and detox your brain by getting off the gadgets, but without something more worthwhile to call to us, it simply doesn’t happen. That few minutes on social media stretches into hours even when we know it’s not good for us. Here’s one way to light up your life and refresh your weary soul. The beginning Beginnings are hard. Often, they take courage. Always, they take effort and energy. But a start is what is needed when you want to make changes. No one else can do this for you. Finding the oomph to get up and try is up to you. I hope to convince you it’s worthwhile. The ‘it’ is creativity. Step one is exploring to find your passion. What is calling to you? Is it writing, painting, woodworking, music, fiber art, or dance— there is a world of possibilities for creative focus. If you aren’t sure, you can explore. Local libraries are great resources for finding various clubs and activities. Or do a Google search for clubs and activities in your area. What sparks your interest? You can be flexible about how much or little you invest in exploring new interests. If art interests you but paints are too expensive, drawing is a creative expression, too. A 4B pencil and paper are all you need. A recorder costs less than a flute and makes captivating sounds. Don’t be too quick to let finances discourage you from your creative calling. Consider how your current interests could be expanded. Do you love watching movies? How about joining or even starting a movie group? It would get you relating to others and thinking about what you were watching rather than just being lost in the screen. Turn a solitary activity into a creative place for relating to friends. Are you always meaning to go for a walk, but tend to avoid getting around to it? There could be a nearby group for that. Getting out into nature is a valuable way to break the negative mental trends that so easily happen. Walking is also recommended as a way to boost creativity. Leave the gadgets at home. Opportunities are as diverse as humans are. Maintaining the flow Once you find an interest, life changes. A new interest gives you a new subject to spend time on, think about, and relate to others about. Once you get some basics down, the joy of creative 

You are not alone Quote by Mark McGinnis, watercolor & ink sketch by Cheryl O Art It’s not easy being human. It is cringeworthy at times. Or is it? I refer to the blushing gaffs we make unintentionally. Oh yes. We all do it. Like many things in life, what matters most is how we respond. The first recommendation, if it’s even vaguely appropriate, is to laugh. Don’t miss out on this potential gold mine of humor — yourself. In the year 100, Epictetus had it figured out. I’m putting his quote into the basket I call timeless truths. He who laughs at himself never runs out of things to laugh at.— Epictetus I confess that there are times when laughing at myself is difficult. Here is what I figured out that can make this easier. I am not alone. One place that reinforced this to me, and you may laugh at this, is Facebook. I refer to the posts such as: The key to making a grilled cheese sandwich is to burn the first side and be ever so careful with how long the second side is cooked.— Unknown Posts like this make me laugh because that is precisely how I make a grilled cheese sandwich. I realize, oh I am not the only one who does this. The posts that end with, ‘asking for a friend’ are similarly funny. We who stumble about knocking the glass over, not finding anything to add to the latest upbeat conversation, having to burp (or worse) during a solemn moment — we are not alone. Knowing this can take so much of the weight off. Fact: an endless multitude of us are continually producing less-than-stellar moments all over the planet. Rejoice! You have found your people! They are — people. Because imperfection is what it means to be human. This understanding is so hard for you perfectionists out there. I used to have some leanings that way myself and unnecessarily beat myself up over small failures. Holy smokes. Such redundant suffering. No one is perfect. We are not made to be perfect. There is a freedom here. Giving yourself the freedom to make mistakes means that you can also be more creative. That’s important! Being creative is where we feel most alive. If you don’t set yourself free to make mistakes, you will be blocking yourself from trying anything new, especially if it is a creative outlet. If that is your case, I mourn the loss of your beautiful imperfect art. That drawing with unusual yet ever-so-sincere shapes, the song you only play alone in your room. We love Grandma Moses and Maude Lewis for their honest expression. Not every successful painter is a Michelangelo. Not all worthwhile art hangs in galleries. Here’s to your song that’s a little off-key but comes from your heart. I never thought either Bob Dylan or Leonard Cohen could sing. That didn’t stop the pleasure of listening. Worthwhile music can happen without being trained for concert halls. Not to belittle the wonder of a Michelangelo or Philharmonic. I have been in awe of both. I merely draw attention to the fact that most of us are not there and never will be. This does not mean 

This can be a problem. Bold Sunset — oil painting by Cheryl O Art The trouble with poets isThey’re prolific in verse.Some of it betterAnd some of it worse.And if you indulge as a critic one-timeYou’ll find yourself covered in mountains of rhyme.AlliterationBoth poignant and pungent.Macabre metaphors,Rare and redundant.Sinewy similes — you could just chew them.Full measured meters that thump till you spew them.Soliloquies eloquent,Tragic verbosities,Unique vernacular,Tongue-tied atrocities,Sonorous syllables, words bold and words cautious,To tantalize senses or be found obnoxious.When –Leaping out from the page,blest surprise!Words wonderfully writtenbring tears to your eyes.Sigh.If that weren’t enoughThere’s the after-discussion.Did you catch my meaning?Could you feel the percussion?Till cross-eyed and weary you come out from underTo ponder if life is a grammatical blunder.Forgive me my friendAs I set this aside.I’ve more than absorbedWhat my thoughts will abide.The sun is just setting and won’t wait for me.The Great Poet speaks and I want to go see.Cheryl O Art Not everything I write is published on this website blog. If you want to read all my writings, you could connect with me on Medium. This platform allows 3 free articles per month for non-members to read. Members pay $5 US per month and in return have access to unlimited articles on almost every topic imaginable.  Here is a link to my profile which also shows other articles I have published on Medium. Cheryl O Art writes on Medium 

Key choices in your colorful world. Sentinel — acrylic by Cheryl O Art People are complicated. Combining a diverse contrast of colors in art and life, we paint a fascinating picture. Dark vs. Light In painting, values refer to the amount of dark or light of a color, between the extremes of black and white. This is a powerful component of many great paintings. A whole painting can fall apart if the values are not well placed. Beautiful light is born of a contrast to darkness.— Ross Turnbull Similarly, the things you value in your life will strongly impact your decisions. And if they don’t, hello depression. Learning to be true to your values is key to good mental health. Certain values in life can be black and white. Don’t murder, don’t steal, don’t sleep with someone else’s partner. The don’ts contrast with the do’s. Do take care of yourself. Do take care of those you love. Do make room to follow your heart. A whole life can fall apart if your values are not well-placed. Colorful Choices But life and art are more than black and white. As important as black and white are in a painting, the myriad of colors in between these extremes create the unique mood of each work of art. In life, the richness of color between the extremes of value leaves us room to express ourselves. What will you do with your time, when all obligations are met? I hope it’s something joyful that expresses who you are. A painting also contains very personal choices. Soft vs. Hard Most paintings have both soft and hard edges. There is no right or wrong about these. They need to be assessed in the context of the whole painting. Soft edges tell the viewer to flow through those areas and explore the painting. Hard edges say, stop here. People also have hard and soft edges. I imagine soft edges in people as the interests you enjoy most. You welcome them, and others who share those interests; an easy flow. Not just in the form of hobbies or sports, although those are valid too, but also in the characteristics you want to possess such as kindness or gentleness. A kind person will be drawn to other kind people. Hard edges in people could relate to boundaries. There are times when boundaries are essential to the integrity of a person. Those whose core values do not align will not be comfortable spending significant time together. This is natural and should be respected. The Complement of Opposites Granted, there are times when colors that are not related can complement each other. Yellow to purple, blue to orange, red to green; these are far from each other on the color wheel but can look stunning when nearby on a painting. You already guessed where this is going with people. Friends with different attributes can greatly enhance life for each other. I think it fair to say that there are no rules about this. Try it out and see. I do that with painting. Smack a color down to see if it works, and if it doesn’t, paint another color on top. It’s a constant learning experience. So is life. Takeaway There 

Finding a positive side to the word ‘Power’ took me a long time. Here is what changed my thoughts. Quote by Mother Teresa. Painting by Cheryl O Art In my journey, the concept of “power” has not been in the slightest way attractive. Frankly, I associated the word ‘power’ with abuse. There were people I knew who wanted power. They loved the thought of being powerful. These people were not trustworthy. Bluntly, I did not want to have anything to do with them. These are strong words, but that has been my experience. I feel this aversion toward power lovers on a personal and a societal level. Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.— Lord Acton It is an intrinsic problem with politics; those who want power are too often those who should never be given power. On a personal level, I am repelled when it becomes evident that someone is focused on power and controlling others. Since I am compassionate and gentle, it took me too long to understand the making of boundaries. I get that now. But that would be a different article. Suffice it to say, the word ‘power’ has many negative connotations for me. The measure of a man is what he does with power.— Plato Until I realized — wait a moment. In an art course, when I teach someone to use color well, I empower them to be more expressive with color. To find their unique voice in paint. By adding those two letters, ‘em’, suddenly I felt very differently about the word ‘power’. Now, empowering can be a concept I find very attractive. The whole concept of ‘empowering’ can hold some very positive associations. Empowerment is needed concerning things more essential than artistic expression — although naturally that one is dear to my heart. The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.— Alice Walker More empowerment is needed for those who suffer abuse based on race, gender, appearance, age, and other factors that unjustly cause people to be treated as less valuable. The day the power of love overrules the love of power, the world will know peace.— Mahatma Gandhi So nowadays you might hear me say, “I want to empower you.” Not empower you to be overbearing or abusive (never ever), but rather to encourage you to find your voice. And I hope that the things you say with your unique voice will make this world a better or more beautiful place. And if that is the case, more power to you. Not everything I write is published on this website blog. If you want to read all my writings, you could connect with me on Medium. This platform allows 3 free articles per month for non-members to read. Members pay $5 US per month and in return have access to unlimited articles on almost every topic imaginable.  Here is a link to my profile which also shows other articles I have published on Medium. Cheryl O Art writes on Medium 

A painter ponders using failure to become a better human Quote by Maria Robinson. Painting by Cheryl O Art I have watched it happen. The Cover-Up A painting that is an ‘almost’ needs more paint on top. That much is obvious to even a beginner. Less obvious is the fact that leaving some of the original layers showing can greatly enhance the finished work. The beginner will blindly cover everything losing the wonderful opportunity to layer. They don’t yet understand, layers can be good. Life isn’t any different. We want to cover our mistakes — completely. There is another way to live. Instead of pretending that we didn’t make that big goof-up, we can look it in the face and learn from it. In that way, we enhance our lives and make the next layer, the next chapter, more worthwhile. Denial is a Nasty Habit Denial nips learning in the bud. Ouch! If that purple you just added doesn’t work in the painting, denial will not move the painting to a better place. Denying that you were mistaken in something you said to a friend will not help you grow personally. It won’t do much for that friendship either. Watch out — optimism can be a stickler. There are moments when optimism needs to step aside. Blind optimism can become denial, and lose the opportunity for learning from our mistakes. Mistakes can move us forward, but only if we let them. Add Interest and Texture In my eyes, a tidy painting doesn’t have the appeal that a painting with bold free brush strokes does. Isn’t that what everyone loves about van Gogh? Those thick luscious brush strokes? Paintings where brush strokes are allowed to be less than perfect have genuine appeal. Painting by Cheryl O Art Similarly, people who are not afraid to admit mistakes are attractive too. It’s those layers of a genuine life that make them stand out. People who admit their mistakes and have learned from them have a lot to share with others. Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity, and change.– Brene Brown That’s part of what makes me a successful art instructor. I make many mistakes when painting. When something goes wrong, I pay attention to precisely what, and how to fix it so I can share that in my art courses. I have 35 years of mistakes to share — heheh – and some successes too. That Prickly Ego It’s easy to be caught up in protecting our ego. Easy to forget to be human. Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to keep going that matters.– Winston Churchill Mistakes in life, even those painful ones, can be golden. The painful ones in particular are a big nudge toward change. Not to hide away, but to learn from. Not to deny, but to think about — what should I do differently? Take Away You have seen it; that perfect life on social media where every mistake is completely covered over. This is not real or healthy. Instead, consider… Recognizing and learning from our mistakes is a grab for freedom. Free from pretending. Free to make changes. Free to be who we are – human. This does take courage, 

We need imagination. Here’s why. Quote by Albert Einstein. Painting by Cheryl O Art This quote by Einstein is startling. How can imagination be more important than knowledge? Life. We see, hear, smell, taste, touch. The harshness and beauty of life exist side by side. Reality is overwhelming enough at times. What then is the use of the imagination? Do we even need it? It turns out we do. Truth That Sticks Imagination is the best vehicle for learning truth. More accurately, the imagination can be the best way to grasp truth and have it stick with you, even change your outlook on life — because when your imagination is engaged, the gray matter is ever so much more likely to hold onto whatever concepts are coming in. For happy example take Frodo Baggins, a mythical furry-toed figment of J.R.R. Tolkien’s imagination. Frodo embodied love of life, loyalty, perseverance under huge trials, and other character traits that are so good to fill the mind and heart with. To emulate even. Not that I plan on dropping any rings into volcanoes or fighting large spiders. Especially the spiders. However, I hope to persevere under trials and be loyal to my friends. By engaging our imaginations, we can absorb and learn these values. It’s how our gray matter works. Science supports this. It takes approximately 400 repetitions to create a new synapse in the brain, unless it is done with play, in which case, it takes between 10 and 20 repetitions.– Dr. Karyn Purvis, developmental psychologist Those numbers are astounding; 400 repetitions compared to 10 to 20. I know which method I would like to use to learn. Playful imagination. When Life Hurts There are people in pain-filled situations. Huge trials. Some folk carry much hurt, physical or emotional. Yet they continue to work for good so that change for the better can become real. So that others may not suffer like they have. If that change does not happen for themselves, they hope for others in the future. Imagining that change, with hope, makes them more able to bear the present. For others to come alongside them in their pain, whether physical, emotional, or any injustice, the first step is to see that there is hurt. Seeing is a start, but just seeing is not enough. Others must imagine how they would feel in that painful situation to have any hope of meaningful action in response. Empathy does not happen without imagination. Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another person. It involves recognizing emotions in others, imagining what they might be experiencing, and responding with care and compassion.– Definition condensed from Miriam-Webster and Oxford Dictionaries Imagining what someone else is experiencing enables others to respond with care and compassion. The Voice of Art Art also speak by engaging the imagination. Art is a powerful force for touching emotions and potentially being a vehicle for truth. There is a road from the eye to heart that does not go through the intellect.– Gilbert J. Chesterton Notice how easily music, color, creative photography, theatre, and other art forms can reach past our intellectual boundaries and move us deeply. That emotional connection is invaluable for speaking truth that sticks. 

There are things more worthwhile to pursue Painting by Cheryl O Art Someone sold us a plastic apple. It’s not what we think it would be. I refer to the pursuit of happiness. Pursuing happiness is chasing soap bubbles. They always pop. Happiness can be right in front of us, and poof, gone. It is elusive because — life. What to do about this? Choose Your Currency I saw a great image on social media. Someone had made a chart of currency through different ages. A 5-year-old’s currency was Lego blocks, a middle-aged person’s currency was dollar bills, and an older person’s was time. Clever! If we are not living thoughtfully, we tend to chase after what the glossy ads tell us to chase. We are brainwashed to accept that those shiny things are the key to a worthwhile life and happiness. Everyone wants to be happy right? What if we choose something else to chase after? What if we can choose our own currency? Let’s look closer. Speaking as someone in the ‘time’ category, I suggest… and please bear with me if this sounds boring because it isn’t once you start… …I suggest the pursuit of priorities is more worthwhile than the pursuit of happiness. Priorities: The Things That Matter Most to You When you figure out what truly matters to you, and live according to that, happiness will no longer be an unpredictable tyrant — sometimes right with you, sometimes floating away like an out-of-reach dandelion seed. I say tyrant because happiness will come and go no matter your wishes. It does that to everyone. This is inevitable because the things that make you happy are often not under your control at all. If happiness is your goal, you will be disappointed every time something happens to make you unhappy. Golly, no need to add disappointment on top of unhappiness. About priorities — your priorities are your choice. No one else makes that choice for you and it’s uniquely personal. Try pursuing some and see what fits best for you. Life may go from flavorless to inspired once you find the priorities that best fit the puzzle that is you. The Big 3 For Me Here are mine. 1. Family and friends. I want to find ways to treasure and enjoy those closest to me. My father in his late 80’s told me, ‘I’m so sorry, Cheryl. My generation did not know we should be involved with our children.’ His words deeply touched me- regret and love were written in his eyes. 2. Self-care. It took me years to understand that self-care is not necessarily self-centered care. A better understanding is, that self-care recognizes that my body and mind are where I live and therefore I need to care for them. You know — healthy food, physical and spiritual exercise, and time for refreshing relaxation. 3. Creativity. Creativity is a powerful force for healing, self-actualization, and more. It’s also a holiday for your brain — no plane ticket required. In my life, being creative is as essential to well-being as anything mentioned in #2. If I could choose another word for what creativity means to me, it would be ‘freedom’. Creativity is where you get to find and 

Helpful tips for a more joyful creative journey Quote and painting by Cheryl O Art It’s a quandary I have seen many times with painters as they grow their art. I speak to painters, but I would not be surprised if these concepts could be applied to other creative arts. The Beginning Most beginning painters start out aiming for realism in their work. It’s a great way to start. You like your photo reference and try matching the colors and shapes with paint. Sounds easy, but there are a multitude — no exaggeration — of skills that need to be conquered to do that well. There are books and classes to help you with that. No need to rush. The beginning is a captivating process too. Folks mostly understand that learning any skill takes time and practice. They expect a challenge at the first. So what’s the problem? Beyond Basics The painful place happens when a painter has the basic skills and begins moving from a realistic artistic expression toward an expression of their unique voice. To be clear, I have nothing against realism. It can be stunningly beautiful. But what I am speaking about is the most common artist’s journey. The majority of artists do not want to remain realists with their work. They would rather find their unique voice between pure abstract (i.e. no subject) and expressive realism. Putting in the brush time, that individual voice will begin to assert itself, quite naturally. The Painful Place What happens next are paintings in progress. Paintings that are on their way to change; on their way to someplace else that is more uniquely ‘you’. I call them ‘almosts’. This is a hard place to be. For the painter who has labored long hours toward realism, it’s not easy to know when to let go of realism and run with their unique expression, especially when initial attempts don’t yield much to be excited about. If this speaks to you, be comforted, you are not alone. Even accomplished artists who welcome evolution in their work can experience ‘almosts’ and the frustration that goes with them. The Fix The place of ‘almosts’ is when you need to take a deep breath and carry on. You’ve got the basics down, now it’s time to fly by the seat of your palette. Set yourself free to play with colors and shapes. Let intuition take control. Give up on that constraining expectation of making a masterpiece. You don’t have to go there. Instead, dive deep into ‘what happens if’; with no expectations for any particular result. Exploring will allow your brush the freedom to find a style you will love — one that expresses who you are. A voice that could belong to no one else. Go With The Flow Be patient with the messes as you journey toward someplace special with your art. The stirred batter does not look like the cake. If you become too frustrated, return to realism for a while. Creativity gets flowing more easily with what has been practiced. Then leap into the new. You can’t lose by aiming for realism again. Who you are will still become evident as you put in the brush time. Just as your signature is