Like you, I do a lot of adulting. And when I have had enough of that nonsense, I call on the child in me to come out and play.
What brings out the child in you? I know you are in there.
Some call it spirit or soul. Some call it essence. Whatever you call it, we are who we are from our first to our final breath.
Think about your earliest memories. Do you recognize yourself in those memories; what you thought and felt, or how you acted? It doesn’t matter your age, you are you.
I find something comforting in knowing that I have always been, well, me. This is a consistent foundation that feels right and whole. It is one of those rare thoughts that makes me go ‘aaah’ and helps me let go of the tension that too often accompanies adulting.
Keeping Afloat
As you grow, your you-ness learns to be more expressive. A 5-year-old does not speak the same way as a 20-year-old. Perhaps less obviously, a 30-year-old does not speak the same way as a 60-year-old. Life does have its impacts, positive and negative.
Sometimes life can wear you down. Responsibilities and the wearying fact that we must pay for our groceries, whatever that makes necessary.
Some actions help us keep swimming above the constant flotsam of mind-numbing routines.
Creativity helps. Creativity can be a doorway to setting free the child within. It’s a way of being alive to who we are.
There is a reason people want to write a book, learn to paint, or be creative in some form. Instinctively, we know that it is in creative moments that we move toward being our true selves.
And, even if only subconsciously, we know that to be our authentic selves means to be free. Free!
Life Events
Major events, traumatic and joyful, can impact us and leave an impression on our spirits. Like a pattern pressed onto the side of a clay pot, these can make us more beautiful.
A few dents along the way are normal.
When those dents begin to push us in directions we were never meant to stretch cracks happen. These wounds make us want to hide or to act in ways unnatural to our spirit.
I’ve experienced some of those. I found these need to be tended to, perhaps with the help of a counselor, to find healing. Do not despair. If your heart is open, you can find your way to who you were meant to be. This journey may hurt for a while but it’s worth it for the freedom on the other side.
Joyful events impact us too. You will know which ones fit with your essence. These are the ones that feel like they are giving you wings. Ones that encourage you to dream, reach, and be the best version of yourself possible.
The people in your life can polarize like that too.
Some go against the grain rubbing us the wrong way and taking us where we do not want to go such as, into a place of anger or frustration. Minimize your time with those people.
Some give us a boost to better reach for our dreams. Treasure those folks and spend more time with them.
Get Loose
One of the big differences between children and adults is constraints. As adults, we have learned a mess of up-tightness.
Sure, some constraints are good — such as not punching anyone who offends us. On the other fist, I mean hand, some constraints are silly and even harmful. The ones that stop us from being who we are and would have us hide behind a mask of what is proper. Games imposed by a society fed the lies that more is better, and gathering more stuff is normal. Neither of those need be true.
Perfectionism? Nope. It just slows you down, waaaay down, and I’ll call Rusty. (Ha! Just dated myself.)
The desire to break away from perfectionism frequently surfaces while I am teaching art to adults. People love the loose freedom of van Gogh’s brush strokes. Students say, “I want to loosen up with my painting.”, but don’t know how to do that in practice.
That’s my job. I help people experience playful practice with their art in a safe and encouraging environment. Tips and techniques come in there too, but all in the context of play. Play is not about perfection. Play is something that your inner child can relate to.
Playfulness improves both creativity and memory. That’s a huge bonus to this approach. When learning is fun, people learn faster and remember better. It’s how our gray matter functions.
These are excellent reasons to let the inner child come out to play.
Take Away
When tempted to be discouraged with my ‘grown up’ life, I have learned to thumb my nose at adulting, call on my inner child, and get playful with paint or words. This brings a richness to life that I know no other way to reach.
How about you? Can [insert your first name here] come out to play?
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